Beloved


I’m a ragdoll, carried by my God.

I hear Jesus speak in a language I do not know.

He takes my limp hand in his, looks at my thumbnail and addresses the atoms by name.

I understand.

They are neither male nor female,

Like God or colors, Read More

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Paths, Pasts & Politics (and one more “P”)

Sunset on Lake Michigan from the back porch. Photography by Amaya Engleking

The past couple weeks after returning from a relaxing vacation on Lake Michigan (yes, actually relaxing, even with the baby and three year-old and cramming as many in-laws into a one-bathroom beach house as possible) have been dynamic.

Something I’ll mention even though it occurred in June but has widened the chasm I feel between myself and the institutionalized church: Read More

Mountain 

Photography by Peter Holme

Threshold. What it takes, the thunderous energy, impossible vitality, to get to a state of relaxation, a feeling that I have adequate energy and vitality… “You need a sail,” suggests Joshua when I tell him it feels like Tom Hanks in Cast Away trying with all his might to get beyond the surf and become un-lost. Sometimes it seems not worth the effort, the expenditure far greater than the reward.

I drove back home alone with the girls after a weekend trip to Denver to see my mom. Heading south, the blessing of a special on Paraguayan guitarist Augustine Barrios filled Read More

Our Sins

Photography by Manuel Libres Librodo Jr.

We like miracles because they are now,

Not because they are from God.

We use God’s love because it serves us well,

Forgetting that without it, we would be dead.

We watch our loved ones sleep

And pray to God they do his will

And then grow afraid of his will.

There lacks congruence in what we Read More

Black Dragon

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Annie Proulx asks, “For who has not heard music at the end of the day, [the most impressionable time] the quarter-light infused by somber harmonies that say everything that has ever been said?”

Yet even after glimpsing –and thereby eternally believing– this revelation, I still chase the black dragon of writing; believing in even stronger than moments that cannot be expressed in words, the ones that only can. There is a profound statement that mystifies the ages in the opening to John’s gospel, and meditating on ‘Christ as God’s word’ carries me to these far reaches of human belief: that not only can we define the indefinable, but it is our duty as writers to pursue the journey. Read More

Temptations, Beans, and Molasses

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I am perplexed by how much my fellow people are letting the culture of our times pervade their thoughts and ways of life.  Currently it is much in vogue to accept people for “who they are,” manifested (certainly in Colorado, where I live) as making marijuana legal and highly visible; to market the mass consumption of commercial drones; to let people choose to end their own lives by doctor-allocated poison, as long as two physicians sign off that they are indeed helpless cases.  We are creating a culture of acquiescing to base desires because we have been traumatized by the fear of the other side that wants to destroy all personal freedom.  But is it wise to fashion a world based on antithesis to what we hate or do not want, akin to a wild teenager doing that which his parents told him not to do for the sole reason of defying authority?  I’m afraid that will not lead us to a more balanced spiritual existence — and thus a happier one — but will just give us loads of self-diagnosed “good people.” Read More