I just don’t get it. Have you been letting the Beyoncés of the world get to you? You, once on wisdom’s path, now believing pride is power is a person’s worth. The pedestal trap. How can you feign to represent the people when your lifestyle reflects such hedonism and elitism? Is that what you and other politicians think? That you are “smarter and more ambitious” than most everyone else and therefore are afforded the right to speak for them? The dissolution and despair I feel when you tell me about your superiority to others, including and especially over your own mother is not because of some intellectual reasoning I’ve come to deduce and therefore let lead my beliefs and life; but it’s visceral, immediate. It hurts my soul to see a temporal identity abusing its own soul. All for the age-old lies of worldly success. I know it angered you when I brought this up before, and I’m forever grappling with how to love and what it’s supposed to look like when challenged with the presence of an adversarial life.
I know God made us sisters for a good reason, and though I’m often perplexed by what that is and how we can start to heal rather than do further harm, I’m certain one of us ‘winning’ is far from what we’re supposed to learn from this lifetime bond. So where do we go from here? We grew from the same womb but whole worlds have since grown in the space between, triangulation cordoned by opaque veils and evanescent memories of girlhood…
2018, Amaya Engleking
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